[Another Year of Frugal Gaming] You Don’t Have To Say You’re Sorry To Look On Further Down The Line
I’ve been ill recently. Like, constantly. The air pollution and
the heat in London seem to be running me down (I don’t smoke, haven’t
for years, but I cough like a packet-a-day man); I’ve had an allergic
reaction to some medication and a resultant round of skin infections bad
enough to put me in hospital; and I work three jobs this time of year,
cranking out work while it’s available. Perhaps that’s a bit more than I
should be doing, all told, and I might avoid taking on major writing
gigs for the rest of the month and give myself a couple of weeks to rest
up and recover. I might also sneak off to Wales for a bit and set up
that escape route. Anyway, the point is I’ve been feeling like crap and
might have been taking that out on people.
I react viscerally and instantly to things – putting it
plainly, for an apparently/allegedly smart guy I have a hot temper. I sort of need to get the
feelings out of the way before I can actually think about things,
which probably explains quite a lot of my behaviour in comment threads;
sometimes I forget that there’s an optimal way for me to engage. My
saving graces are that it
wears off quickly and I’m prepared to take correction once my boots are cooled – but people don’t always catch the “I could be totally wrong” part, and it’s true that what’s said is said and what’s done is done.
… you wrote three paragraphs dwelling about not liking things and how much you don’t like that other people do like it. Which, hate to say, is becoming a common theme on your writing. I’m going to sound like an ass for saying this, but you are becoming Stelek, and at least Stelek manages to be funny and enjoy things.
Well, they say The Truth Hurts, and that did prickle me a bit. It’s a fair cop, really. Over the years I’ve written a lot more than three paragraphs dwelling on not liking things, and how lots of other people like things so there’s a lot of demand for things I don’t like, so more things I don’t like get made, and after a while the sheer amount of things I don’t like sours my guts somewhat. Whether that gives me a right to constantly spew the resultant fluids over the Internet is another matter.
|Don’t get within six inches of me when I’m in a bad mood, that’s all I’m saying.|
Part of it’s probably the cathartic effect of finally looking at things I’ve been pretending to like, or deluding myself about liking, for years on end, and finally being honest about them. There’s a tiny bit of a rush to it. That’s kinda compelling. The problem is that it’s difficult to stem the flow once I’ve started, and soon the older, grittier gripes are pouring out as well, because I’m on a roll and man, complaining makes me feel better. Which is fine, but a) I’ve done most of my particular complaints to death and b) there’s only so much I can add to the general level of toxicity around the Internet before I’m officially Part Of The Problem.
The recent recording of a podcast on the End Times proved that without a doubt. Trust me when I say that it was both immensely fun to record, for the exact reason stated above, and an extended personal insult to… well, probably 95% of the listener base. It was elitist, embittered and embarrassingly poor in its articulation. I’m a-OK with saying things are bad. That’s fine. I like some things which are genuinely bad, after all, and I don’t mind admitting that they’re bad. I might even endorse hyperbole, from time to time, if it’s amusing.
Where I draw the line, though, is not being able to explain, plainly and directly, why things are bad. If I can’t prove my points then I have no business making them, and if I can’t clearly articulate what’s good about something that is good, my judgement is at best questionable. And, ultimately, the whole point about ragequitting things is that you’re supposed to rage, then quit. The truth is that I simply don’t have a dog in the Warhammer race any more, and I haven’t for a few years now. What’s the point in talking about something about which I simply don’t care?
I can’t promise unmitigated enthusiasm for all things in Creation. That’s not my jam. But it is about time to quit yakking about games I don’t play any more and have very few positive feelings left towards; to go forward, and not back. That’s all I’ve got and I hope it’s enough.
Let’s have a report.
|Khador Marksman||IKRPG||Facebook trade||£5.00||Carry-Over from last month||£0.00|
|Shipping (Daemons)||£2.80||Retribution deposit||WM/H||£25.00|
|Backswords and Bucklers Book 2||OSR D&D||Lulu||£1.20||Chaos Daemons Codex||40K||£20.00|
|Shipping (Blood Bowl)||£5.40||Blood Bowl||BB||£40.00|
|Iron Kingdoms RPG||IKRPG||Amazon||£34.74||Iron Kingdoms RPG||IKRPG||£40.00|
|D&D character sheet printing||OSR D&D||£1.00||Vraska the Unseen x 2||M:tG||£11.98|
|Hypnos kit & glaze medium||WM/H||Dark Sphere||£10.04||Foil Cathedral of War||M:tG||£3.41|
|Retribution battlegroup||WM/H||Dark Sphere||£29.66||Mercenaries & case||WM/H||£60.00|
|Bus fare to Dark Sphere||WM/H||£1.50||Retribution battlegroup||WM/H||£20.00|
|Diablo III bundle||PC||Blizzard||£42.99||Sukubus Team||BB||£72.00|
|Metal Slayer||WM/H||Facebook trade||£10.00||Retribution army||WM/H||£175.00|
|World of Warcraft subscription||PC||Blizzard||£9.99||Cryx army||WM/H||£200.00|
|Vraska x 2 shipping||M:tG||£0.99|
|Foil Cathedral of War shipping||M:tG||£0.99|
|WoW character transfer||PC||Blizzard||£17.00|
|WoW race change||PC||Blizzard||£17.00|
|Hearthstone card pack||PC||Blizzard||£34.99|
|Shipping (Retribution army)||£17.99|
|Shipping (Sukubus Team)||£4.74|
|Anrakyr the Traveller||40K||GW||-£0.50|
|WoW faction transfer||PC||Blizzard||£22.00|
|Salute 2015 ticket||Con||£10.00|
|Shipping (Cryx army)||£14.98|
|Packet of Jaffa Cakes||DZC||£1.00|
|Goff Rokkers||40K (RT)||Facebook trade||£13.50|
I rescued my inappropriately dressed Shadow Priest from the rubble of a dead guild by bringing her back to the Alliance. The class is really quite a challenge for me to play, and I like breaking her out when I’m bored with endgame and want a bit of a challenge and the thrill of actually gaining XP.
Since Ben and Simon are in town for Salute at the end of the month I thought I might stretch a point and join them for fun and frolics. I have some cash in the can, having liquidated my entire Warmachine collection now, and I’ll be taking a bit of spending money down to the show. I’ve also pre-ordered some SAGA Revenants, in a total SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY incident; SAGA is a game I’m thinking about exploring anyway, and now it has an army of walking corpses. That’s going to be pretty convenient for some of the stuff I want to do with roleplaying later in the year, too; I’ll be needing some comparably-scaled undead, Byzantines, Teutons and Eastern European soldiery.
The Goff Rokkers were a total impulse purchase but I regret nothing. I like painting Orks and since I have absolutely no painting queue at the moment it’ll be nice to make some use of the sunny days before I drag myself off to work in the evenings.
The WoW situation needs some careful monitoring, since I now have six characters who are at some stage of the Warlords of Draenor process. This wasn’t the plan – the plan was to main my Warlock and level a new Death Knight on the new server for doing tank duty with me guildies – but I think I can keep things under control provided I set myself a goal every time I sit down to play and then stop once I’m done.
While I was up Birmingham way for Travelling Morgue (keep an eye on Corehammer for the writeup and pictures of women singing about zombies), the matter of the Dropzone Commander demo and the associated bet (would I be able to learn the game in 90 minutes and would I end up thinking about strategery, tic-tacs and list building at the end of it?) was finally resolved – hence the packet of Jaffa Cakes down there at the bottom of the purchase list.
And finally, there was some roleplaying; the Dark Ages Vampire game spluttered back into life, and our merry band of bloodsuckers are on their way to Transylvania. The War of Princes is kicking off, and Constantinople’s a hot potato right now; Nikodemos the Tzimisce was Embraced to fight the Tremere anyway, Aziz the Nosferatu needs secrets and strife to secure himself on the Road of the Dark Mother (a homebrewed conspiracy morality based on the modern game’s Path of Lilith; I’ll talk more about that on GAME OVER sometime); and Ranulf the Brujah is frankly safer on a battlefield than in a city where he’s been pretending he knows how to Primogen for a year. That might explain my newfound enthusiasm for historical miniatures to a point; the final push came when that Beat Ronin bloke and that Dice Bag Lady and half the SLWG kept on talking up SAGA. Can’t hurt to give it a punt.