Knowing When You’re Wrong
Hey folks! We have a guest post from His Royal Pinkness, Kirby!
Knowing when you’re wrong is really hard. Knowing when you’re wrong and doing nothing about it is easy. Knowing when you’re wrong and doing something about it is even harder.
I was wrong to do this to SinSynn (who wrote an excellent article at my request for 3++, had people question his writing style and then did not have me stand up for him).
This post is for SinSynn.
I hope it helps you with your wargaming, your blogging and how you approach life in general.
Winning and not learning is pretty damn easy. You win, you point out all the things you clearly did well and that clearly led to your victory and move on. Your opponent laments their loss pointing out all the dice rolls that didn’t go their way.
They move on.
And you both continue to royally fuck up.
Suck it up – you did something you shouldn’t have. You turned your Wave Serpent around and went “hurr hurr – I have a turret!” and then someone shot you in the ass.
It wasn’t dice. It wasn’t luck.
It was you.
You can’t claim any tactical brilliance for taking advantage of that – Megan Fox could do that gosh darnit! I mean really, post-game analysis:
“So Fred, how did you beat the almighty and amazing pink fluff ball?”
“Well Ted, I pulled a brilliant tactical manoeuvre and I shot at the rear of him.”
“Impressive! How did you manage to get behind his army in one piece?”
“Uh well, he kind of reversed up the field…”
“So, you sat still and rolled dice?”
Not that awe inspiring is it? (if you answered yes, I have cards with the word psychologist on them; I recommend finding someone who gives a damn)
Let’s flip the script.
You lost and you cussed out the dice pretty hard. Same conversation above but in reverse is going to sound just as dumb but most people think just that little bit harder when they lose because, well they don’t like to lose. They start to pontificate, start to look back…
What if the dice weren’t that bad? What could I have done differently?
Their inner selves are crying out for self-reflection and ego-boosting at the same time (and still identifying the key losing factor as the dice) and thus in the strive for perfection, identify one or two basic mistakes which could help them improve for the next game or the game after that.
Great! Fantastic! You’ve upgraded by 0.01 of a level. Don’t worry, there’s only an infinite amount of levels until you reach self-actualisation. The don’t call it the game of LIFE for nothing!
What happens though if you threw out all pre-conceptions.
Fuck the dice. Fuck your opponent. Fuck Megan Fox.
What did I do wrong AND what did my opponent do wrong? Where did the game start going wrong? Hell, what did the guy over in the next town do wrong and how can I GROW from this?
Did I come to the table with a rubber dildo when the other guy/gal had a full sex shop? Was it your deployment? Your first move? Or move 9000? Doesn’t matter – admit it. You screwed the pooch. Your opponent screwed the pooch. Someone fucking screwed the pooch!
Now stop for a minute. Get that noggin working. Hit a eureka moment.
You’ve been forced to self-analyse your play here because you lost; or hell, your attitude you approached the game with. You’ve done it kicking and screaming, unwillingly and thrown a tantrum about it (I don’t even know if I should point and laugh at that but seriously) and maybe, MAYBE, learned something.
Now go at this process with an open mind. You know what, maybe I’m not perfect. Maybe it was my fault I lost the game regardless of what the dice or my opponent even did. Maybe I was a cocked up douche-bag and just ain’t all that I think I am.
Now take this a step further.
You won the game. You still fucked up. Own it. Rejoice in your ever extending reach for the stars. Be content with latching onto to that big fucking ball of (astro)dirt? we call the Moon. That’s still impressive. But you could do more.
Just because you won, doesn’t mean you weren’t wrong.
Just because you were right, doesn’t mean you weren’t wrong.
You can learn from anything, anytime, anywhere. The minute you stop doing this, is the minute you reach mundane. Plebeian. Boring. Uninspiring. Arrogant. Egotistical. Prone to even more mistakes. Narcissistic. Overbearing. Not worth knowing.
I was wrong.
I’m sorry SinSynn.